red ending...

alignments... wow... sometimes stuff just aligns when you least expect it...

moments ago i was sitting here at my computer tonight attempting to write a poem and i suspect i was almost three quarters way through a first draft when the power went out... and was left sitting in a quiet blackness... just like that... no light.. no sound... nada...

well.. so much for that idea... the poem is now lost cuz i hadn't saved it... and not sure if it will ever come back... but that's okay... i think...

sitting blinded after a sigh and rolling my eyeballs i got up and groped for where i knew a lighter was and lit a candle that was nearby... then carefully went downstairs, lit some more candles, sat on the couch for a moment then decided to interact with a frame drum for a bit and then... the lights came back on as abruptly as they went out...

okay... ratzoid... i was kind of liking the black dark... as this doesn't happen often enough i don't think...

last week when i was still in Sorrento... on the last day of our north workshop weekend... we were back at our dear friend's lake-front home getting the rest of our stuff packed up to begin our journey home... i knew i had some work left to do at the lake...

and so... after loading the last bags and stuff into the car... off i headed down to the beach with my mesa under my arm while quickly zipping up my coat... this day was chilly windy and the water on the lake choppy with waves... when i set foot on the rocky little dock i had to be mindful of my balance... i knelt down on one knee and quickly opened my mesa... corner by corner and chose two beloved stones... one known and the other what seems to be a becoming... i've yet to know... seems to be singing some song about a particular mountain i think... at least that what it seems to sound like...

one stone was red and the other is white...

standing, i take the two stones together cupped in my chilled hands and blow the breath of my life into the red one that's on top of white one through each other.... then some tears want to come... i pause for a moment and look up and out to the lady of the lake... i witness her breathing and the ryhthm of her waves surrounding me... moving me up and down on the floating dock i stand on...

about 6 feet out in the water, i notice three fish swimming together very slowly with their top fins poking out of the water... they seem to be salmon... i've never seen salmon here before! ...wow... when i look closer... they are all a bright blood pinky-red and i then realize it's the time of the salmon run and i guess they have finally come home... coming home to spawn... and die...

i didn't notice before but now realize behind me on the beach that many have already come home and many are lying dead everywhere... bloated white with the waves beating over them... some are buried partly in the sand and some are still red having died probably only a short time before... or are still dying... wow... this is wild... i wasn't expecting this scene...

i bring myself back and return to the two stones i hold in my wet, cold hands and blow again.... and again... i blow it all through and let some tears come this time... i'm not really sure why the tears have come... but i get a sense that maybe yet again... i've said goodbye to another pacha in my life... something has definitely died in me and i now welcome the new... and i really don't know... the what... where... how... or when... or?...

together... me and the lake... we take a deep, deep breath... lovingly holding the beloved red stone, kneeling back down, i gently kiss it... whisper my goodbye... give my thanks and send it to a home into the lake where i was told to do so... after it falls into the water i also say goodbye to the three fire red salmon who slowly swim away knowing that soon they will die too...

standing back up... i close my damp eyes, swallow the lump in my throat and listen to a song of the wind in my hair...

weaver (((o)))